I guess I should explain.
I’ve decided to base my life (and proudly so) on 1 Corinthians 4:10-13.
It says..
We are fools for Christ, but you are so wise in Christ! We are weak, but you are strong! You are honored, we are dishonored! To this very hour we go hungry and thirsty, we are in rags, we are brutally treated, we are homeless. We work hard with our own hands. When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure it; when we are slandered, we answer kindly. Up to this moment we have become the scum of the earth, the refuse of the world.
I want to live like Paul lived;
But he said to me, “My grace is enough for you. When you are weak, my power is made perfect in you.” So I am very happy to brag about my weaknesses. Then Christ’s power can live in me. For this reason I am happy when I have weaknesses, insults, hard times, sufferings, and all kinds of troubles for Christ. Because when I am weak, then I am truly strong. 2 Corin 12:9-10
In the moments that we’ve been run ragged and made threadbare, the moments where we’re treated as the scum of the earth.. doesn’t it seem like in those moments we are closer to Christ? Because in those moments, we’ll forsake everything we think we deserve and truly worship God. We’ll draw near to him without constructing any walls, because we’re too exhausted and weak. I want to live in a way that is fraught with suffering; I want to be scarred for Jesus. Paul brags about his hard times not to show us how manly and strong he is, but to show us that he only lives because of the supremacy of the One he serves.
So I’m stepping out as a threadbare soldier for my God. I might be tired, naked and weak, but by His strength and power I am mighty, and I don’t desire nor deserve anything more.